The Show Must Go On! (and other famous last words…)

As I’m writing this I am hooked on to a drip in a hospital bed at Constantiaberg Mediclinic in Cape Town. I dragged myself to the ER early Thursday morning and haven’t left since, it’s Saturday, day before Easter.

Let’s rewind 5 days …..

The week of Easter is usually a busy one for musicians. In The Netherlands it would mean I’m in the middle of the yearly St Matthew Passion Marathon (about 6-8 performances with the equivalent amount of FDR’s, always orchestra 2 😁 so I can enjoy the arias of orchestra 1 😉 but this is getting off track). In Cape Town it means at least 1 or 2 Messiah’s and the Easter celebrations at St George’s Cathedral on Easter Sunday. This year the CPO also has Stabat Mater by Rossini on the schedule. Seven days of work, not a week to get sick…

Monday I was feeling fine during our 2 rehearsals, 1 for Stabat Mater and 1 for Messiah. So far so good.

Tuesday I wake up with a stinging pain in my upper back, side and there’s a tight elastic band around my midriff which makes it painful to breathe … what the heck!?! 😳 Now I was diagnosed with gastro reflux a few weeks earlier for which I had meds and was getting better so I’m thinking maybe it’s turned hectic suddenly again. Train of thought: “The rehearsal in the evening is with 3 basses, one less isn’t a train smash. Let me cancel my teaching and rehearsal for today, watch what I eat and I’m sure I’ll feel better tomorrow”.

Wednesday‘s train of thought as I wake up: “ok, I still feel like driven over by a bus 🥴 but tonight is Messiah rehearsal, which is just me (one bass) … and I’m sure I’ll be fine by the weekend for the performances and it’s going to be a logistical nightmare to have one of my colleagues to fill in for me for the one rehearsal and … (more excuses) and … (more excuses) so I’ll just take a painkiller and fluff my way through the rehearsal. I’m sure I’ll be fine…” Famous last words.

By the time we finished the Hallelujah choir in the evening run through I was in so much pain I had to stop playing which means for most musicians they are almost dying, because otherwise you just don’t stop. I’ve played through so many tendinitis issues, migraines, day after knee operation still half sedated, coughing my lungs out due to flu, but as they say : “The Show Must Go On” 💪🏻 So we go on and suffer later.

But something was wrong, seriously not right, I need to stop, now! Ouch ouch ouch! Next issue: is this the moment you go to ER??? As a Dutchy and Gen X I tend to just go to bed and suffer through whatever it is and it will eventually pass again, but this felt different.

Thursday early morning (yes, I still suffered through the night) on my marvellous GP Steven Van De Merwe’s advise I grabbed my phone and keys and headed to the ER telling my doggies I’d be back in a couple of hours … Boy was I wrong! 🤦🏼‍♀️ But was I absolutely right to go to the ER!!

Blood tests, a chest X-ray and CT-scan later it turns out that the portal vein in the liver has a blood clot ( Portal Vein Thrombosis ) which is causing havoc on more organs which is causing the intense pain. My platelet count is 800.000 instead of the healthy 150.000 – 400.000 and the cause of this needs to be found asap and I’ll be admitted to hospital for overnight monitoring and more blood tests in the morning 😳 What the f*k!?!

First thoughts: 1: my poor doggies!! Inside at home since early morning and dad will only be home by 17:30 earliest 🥺 2: msg my bass section, orchestra manager … uhm … uhm … stage crew … and … oh right 🤦🏼‍♀️ 3: my partner Steven! Yes, my partner is 3rd on the list, as I said before, a musician’s work comes first, unless you have doggies … then it’s 2nd 😉

So back to where this blog started, Saturday morning Easter weekend. I will need a bone marrow biopsy to narrow down the cause of the high platelet count and a gastroscopy to see if this Portal Vein Thrombosis didn’t do too much damage. These can only happen after Easter and it’s safest to just keep me in hospital where they can monitor me and give me the injection meds (and to be honest, it’s kinda nice to be taken care of by the excellent nurses here 😬 ) This does also mean I will also have to surrender to the fact that I’ll be out for next week’s Symphony Concert, the 1st of the Autumn Season, because the rehearsals start immediately after Easter.

Once the good doctor Perry Loebenberg narrows down what’s the cause of it all I’ll get the right medication and I should be fully functional again for the week after, when we play the 10th Symphony by Shostakovich! With 6 basses!! With Bernhard Gueller !!! 😃

To be continued … 🙂